I MAY Have Been Drunk

by Michelle

I was going through my notes on my iPhone and I found several things I have no memory of writing. Which might mean I was drunk when I wrote these “hilarious” ideas.

— “50 shades of cray” jay z and kanyes new song — it’s really graphic but for some reason women really like it. (I can’t be sure that I even thought this one up completely on my own. Either way it makes me laugh)

— Stayin Alive started playing on my iPod and at the same moment a dude who looks like John Travolta in Saturday Night Fever sat down across from me — What are you trying to tell me universe???? (clearly the universe wants me to be a scientologist)

— Two dudes who are way past the age where it’s okay to stand on a street corner on skate boards in cut off tees blowing bubbles…. (not sure where I was going with this one)

— Things I thought street meat was before I ate it (male hookers, mostly)

— City smells in the spring: Hot asphalt, Urine, Urine, Cat urine. (I really hate the smell of urine)

These might have also been “middle of the night ideas.” I get those a lot and then wake up to notes that say things like “ice cream truck — TITANIC AND MONEY”

Anderson out.