Reasons Why I’m Single

by Michelle

I like to take stock of things once in a while – here’s my most recent list:

  • I make a lot of dick jokes
  • One of my guy friends recently shared something that was really bothering him, this was my response: “now….when did you actually discover that you…were a pussy?”
  • I laugh really loud
  • I punch kind of hard
  • I correct men and women alike when they are wrong
  • I make fun of people when I like them
  • I make A LOT of dick jokes
  • My biting sarcasm
  • I prefer men who have no interest in me
  • Anywhere there is music playing I break into the robot
  • I give intricate lessons on harry potter and dolphins to complete strangers
  • I talk during movies
  • Did I mention I make a lot of dick jokes?
  • I would sacrifice the comfort of almost any social situation for a joke
  • I say fuck a lot
  • I am always spewing random facts

I’m sure there is a lot more that I can add to that list – feel free to contribute, I like to be thorough.

Anderson Out.