Gymiquette

by Michelle

Gym etiquette – or as I have so cleverly coined it, Gymiquette (I know – how am I not more famous??) – is something that doesn’t seem to exist at New York Sports Clubs. First and foremost at a gym, I want some personal space. Real Talk: Don’t stand/lay so close to me while I am sweating through my workout – you are distracting me from holding this plank! Also, I am going to do two reps on the machine so just let me get through it and don’t linger.
On the other hand, you and your over muscled friend cannot hijack a machine for 30 minutes pumping up your muscles and telling each other how good you look. Jesus, get a room – or at the very least go into the locker room and jack each other off – then at least someone else can work out their arms (on the machine, I mean).
Another problem with gym goers is their attire. I would like to preface this with the fact that I love leggings – they are the best thing to every happen to my comfort level and I am on my knees thankful that they are in style. But let’s be clear, they are not pants nor are they workout pants. I can see your thong through your cheap target leggings, which makes me think one of two things: you are an idiot who doesn’t know that thin material is transparent, or you are a whore. Either way, please buy running leggings – they can be found cheap – because I do not appreciate your fat ass in those see-through pants while you are on the stair stepper. Men suffer from this too – I saw a guy in board shorts at the gym…twice…the same guy!!! Was he confused? Did he think that particular location had pools and when he realized that it didn’t decided to work out anyways? And then forgot and wore board shorts to the gym another time? Seriously dude, I like your arms but not your board shorts. That cannot be comfortable…the fabric…..yuck.

Anderson Out.

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