I Got 99 Problems…
…and they’re all passive aggressive bitches. Someone very close to me let’s call that person, BFF, was recently betrayed by someone that she was very close to. BFF is someone I highly regard, and one of the few people I believe will be in my life forever. This situation got me thinking about the disproportionate amount of betrayals I see happening to people I care about, and also to myself. The generation that I have been born into (one I fiercely believe I do not belong in), is one that I call the cell phone generation. There is this idea that a quick text to someone who you have plans with, even if it is 5 minutes before you are supposed to meet up, should excuse you from those plans. I see this happening on a regular basis, and I think it has bread this culture of selfishness where we all think about what makes us happy at that very moment and nothing else. Nothing has consequences to people, therefore treating people with respect is no longer important. I have oft in my life received the reputation as a bitch or an asshole who talks and then thinks. I didn’t have a lot of friends growing up and constantly felt betrayed by the people I once called friends. For years I never understood the concept of a fast friendship. You meet someone and suddenly you are best friends. And just as suddenly that person is out of your life without a second thought as to what they meant to you. These are not the type of friendships I strive for. There is a naivety in these friendships – thinking that you can trust someone with who you are so quickly. I wasn’t programmed that way. Experiences in my life have led me to not allow many people to truly know me.
BFF is someone who became as such over the past 10 years. We have lived apart for more than half of our friendship but I can always count on a phone call or a nice card or someone just to listen when things are going wrong in my life. She has seen me at my worst. She loved me even when I was depressed and socially shitty after my dad and stepmom got divorced. She traveled with me to london (I suck to travel with – I get very stressed), she traveled with me to germany while I was in a shit relationship and therefore was a little shit. And never once has she asked me to change – she has always shown love for me just as I am. So, never could I imagine that someone would want to hurt her. I don’t like bitches that hurt my BFF.
I believe in loving people for who there are, enjoying the people around you (even if they annoy you), and always being exactly who you are and nothing different. I’m no optimist. I am a glass half empty kind of person – my glass is just half empty of something delicious.
This was painfully honest. But it’s how I feel.